The title of this post is a terribly botched attempt to convey something semi-clever. But since it is, as I just mentioned, completely botched, now I have to explain it. This post will consist of two different experiences I have had recently that are fairly unique to the environment I work in. The first shows how far I’ve come as an iOS developer, and the other involves me being physically displaced by some distance. The two phrases are similar. Get it? I want half-credit for it, much like when someone points out that there is a good joke to be made, but can’t quite figure one out.
The last feature I had to implement for the build of Cube that was being shipped to Brian Zoubek for the opening of his new cream puff bakery (seriously) was a simple time clock. I don’t think the back end is setup to support it yet, so this feature was essentially a stopwatch that kept running as the user went to different pages of the app. This seemed like an easy enough feature, so I didn’t start to work on it until two hours before the product was supposed to be done.
Oops. It was a little more complicated than I thought. Due to the architecture of the app, getting it to work correctly more or less required some restructuring of the app’s flow. Without delving too far into the details, I had to change the app to return to the home page every time an order screen was exited. This could easily have taken a day earlier on in my iOS career. But with only an hour left, and recognizing it was the only elegant way to solve my problem, I had the confidence to just go for it. I didn’t even stop to consider worse, but less extensive changes. I just executed.
Also, tonight I’m sleeping at my girlfriend’s house. This isn’t entirely unusual. I’ve been staying here a night or two every week. What is unusual is the cause. I planned on spending the night at the office, but instead I have been evicted. No, I wasn’t fired, nor did I cause problems and get asked to sleep elsewhere. I was evicted by a rattlesnake. There is, apparently, a baby rattlesnake that, as of 10:30PM, moved its residence from the backyard to under the laundry machine, where it will (hopefully) continue to reside until animal control arrives to remove it in the afternoon. Why they feel they can wait until the afternoon to remove a death machine from a place that more than ten people sleep, I don’t know. But I do know that the CEO’s solution to block off the doors with towels was not going to be nearly enough to get me to sleep there tonight. I am similar to Indiana Jones in many ways, and one of them is that I hate snakes.